Way of the Heart: Lesson Eleven - Question Three
Jeshua, how does one teach a young child peace and Love when they’re acting out their fear and anger?
Beloved friend, this could, indeed, be a whole year’s tape series in itself. However, for the sake of this hour, we would say this unto you: Remember well that when you perceive a child acting out their anger, their fear, whatever it may be, first, ask yourself: Are you sure it’s theirs, just because it is being expressed where their body seems to be? For be of assuredness, that children come into this world sparkling clean. They are very clear — very clear and very, very sensitive. Therefore, if there are emotions that the parents are not dealing with within themselves, if there is lack of communication between the parents, if there is anger that has been repressed in the mother or the father, then indeed, the child will know it, and often will begin to unconsciously act it out, since nobody else is bothering to, shall we say, “clear the decks” and be honest. Therefore first ask yourself: How do you know it’s their anger? Ask the Holy Spirit,
What is the source of this?
The answer will not be hidden.
Now, how to help them? Where you perceive anger in another, first make sure that you are clear of anger within yourself. Then, as you look upon the child, remember that that child is perfectly free now. Ask of yourself: Does their anger, their acting out, push your buttons? Can you give them the space and the freedom to act out that anger, to move that energy in a way that is healthful and helpful? Can you allow them to do so? And convey to them that,
This looks like fun! Maybe I’ll join you!
And start to move your body the way they’re moving their body. Make the sounds that they are making. And tell them straight out like an adult. Stop talking gibberish to children, for they are as old as you are the moment they are born. Tell them in perfectly clear adult language,
Anger is perfectly okay. Let’s get into it and see how it feels in the body.
Have fun with it. Make it as charged as possible. And you will find that, in a very short moment, the anger will shift, and the children will begin to feel a sense of play. For they will know that they have been accepted, and that there is nothing wrong with them the way that they are. Just because they don’t conform to adult perceptions does not make them wrong.
How, then, do you teach them of peace? By being peace yourself. How, then, do you teach them to cultivate peace? By not hiding from them your own emotions, by living honestly — not hurtfully, but honestly.
Yes, I’m feeling angry right now! It makes my stomach tight and my shoulders crinkle up into my ears. It makes my knuckles get white. And I just want to stamp my feet!
Well, do it right there in front of the child! And, as you start to feel better, you can smile and say,
See how easy it is? I think I’ll just be at peace now.
Therefore, always remember that the greatest of gifts you can give to a child is to be the living embodiment and model of one who does not deny or repress their humanity.
Beloved friend, each relationship is a teaching and learning relationship. Therefore, when a child seems to be acting out their anger, first give them the space to do it, and observe the child. How do they move their body? Do they just live in their head? Or is their whole being involved in it? What can you learn from the child?
And when the anger has subsided, always, always, always wrap your arms around them, at least metaphorically. Let them know that you love them. Let them know they’re okay. Let them know that yes you too know that sometimes it’s a little hard to be in the world and that you thank them for being present in your life, because you are committed to learning from them as much as you are committed to teaching them.
Cease — everyone that could hear these words upon your planet — cease treating children like second class, incapable people. Their consciousness is clear and bright! Talk to them like an adult. Live like a mature adult in your relationships with them. Give this a try, beloved friend. There is much here for you, if you will but cultivate the treasure within these words.