Apr 29, 2012
T18.9 The Delusional Thought System

Good evening. And welcome to everyone who’s joining us on the Internet.

So, we’re coming down to simplicity. The simplicity of the two-step, which means shutting up—step 1—and enquiring of the Father or the Holy Spirit: “What is the truth here? In other words, separate and apart from whatever I think things mean, What is the truth here?” and then listening.

The other part of the simplicity is also dual, in that it involves shifting from body identification to Mind identification. Shifting from the perception of yourself as the body you see, to the awareness of yourself that is the Mind, the conscious awareness in which your body, world and universe are being experienced. This is the simplicity.

These are the only factors there are in the process of Awakening. This whole book, A Course In Miracles, is aimed not on teaching a philosophy, not on teaching a theory, but on directing your attention to these two dual factors. Why? So that you can involve yourself in change, not so that you can involve yourself in new levels of knowing and new theories to be able to logically put together in such a manner that it will force a conclusion that will cause you to change. No.

This is important.

Now we have a new section tonight, entitled either

The Delusional Thought System1

… in some of the copies of the Course, and …

The Two Worlds

And it begins …

You have been told to bring the darkness to the light, and guilt to holiness. And you have also been told that error must be corrected at its source. Therefore, it is the tiny part of yourself, the little thought that seems split off and separate, which the Holy Spirit needs.

It’s this little part inside the bubble—inside this artificial boundary—that separates you from the rest of You. It’s this little part that the Holy Spirit needs.

Now for perspective, and I’m aware we’ve discussed this over and over but it needs to be remembered: That which is on the outside of the bubble is identically the same thing as that which is on the inside of the bubble. This flimsy bubble simply creates a division in that which is One. And it isn’t even solid. The “you” that identifies itself as what is inside the circle is the same substance, the same atmosphere, the same thing that is on the outside of the bubble because there’s only one Presence, and a little bubble didn’t create two.

Now, as long as you got your divorce from the Father and you are identifying yourself as that which is private and tiny, something, we’ll say, had to be done to the rest of You that you’ve chosen to ignore. And what was done, we will say, is that the Father identified it as the Holy Spirit—the rest of You that you are not presently embracing. And so, that of You which is on the outside of the bubble, which is intent upon reuniting itself with the part of it that is on the inside of the bubble is called, “The Holy Spirit.”

Why does the Holy Spirit need you? Because it needs the you that identifies itself as being inside the bubble because it’s the rest of Itself. Its intent is for Itself to be whole which means for you not to be separated from It any longer, and not to be experiencing a false perception of yourself any longer and suffering from it.

So …

… it is the tiny part of yourself, the little thought that seems split off and separate, which the Holy Spirit needs. The rest is fully in God’s keeping, and NEEDS no guide. Yet this wild and delusional thought …

… inside the bubble …

… needs help because, in its delusions, it thinks it is the Son of God, whole and omnipotent, sole ruler of the kingdom it set apart to tyrannize by madness into obedience and slavery.

I know you’re getting used to the severity of the words and that you understand that the kingdom it set apart to tyrannize by madness into obedience and slavery is another way of saying that the you, who has given definition to everything and overlaid it upon the Kingdom of Heaven, so that you can now claim it to be your kingdom, that creation of yours—that imaginary configuration of ideas—that doesn’t reflect what the Father is Being there, has been made in a context where you are frightened, where you are governed by fear and guilt.

As a result of your fear, you manipulate this world that you have given definition to, and you have treated the world as though it is an opponent. And the only way to govern an opponent is through manipulation, severity, threat, and to enslave it, we will say, by means of mutual agreements that cause it and everything in it to behave in a way that doesn’t destroy you, because you are afraid it will.

This is a terrible state of mind to be in—to be governed by and to attempt to govern everything else by. And it is this that it is your Birthright to be freed from and freeing you from it is what we’re engaged in.

This is the little part of you you think you stole from Heaven.

Well, maybe you didn’t think you stole it from Heaven, but when you said, “Father, I’d rather see things my way, I would rather determine how things work, what they are, what their purpose and meaning is, I want a divorce.” And so you separated yourself on the premise that you felt you could successfully function independent of your Father—independent of your Source—and be successful at it.

So …

This is the little part of you you think you stole from Heaven. Give it back to Heaven.

What does that mean? It means release your attempts at control of it. Let God be in charge again.

Give it back to Heaven. Heaven has not lost it, but YOU have lost sight of Heaven.

Of course. You said, “Father, I’d rather see it my way. I’d rather have my own sight.”

Let the Holy Spirit remove it.

That’s what the process of Awakening is involved in—letting the Holy Spirit remove it. Let go of your control.

Let the Holy Spirit remove it from the withered kingdom in which you set it off, surrounded by darkness, guarded by attack, and reinforced by hate.

Again, if you think those words are too harsh, they aren’t. Because think of how fundamentally you treat and go through your day in a self-protective mode, in a manner that will help you avoid the occasion of fear. Notice how dominant fear seems to be as a potential and look squarely at the fact that it interferes with your joy, so much so that you can’t say every day at the end of the day, “My day was full of joy.”

But you can say, “My day wasn’t full of misery … I am very grateful!” And in effect, your feeling of gratitude is being a substitute for joy and yet the gratitude isn’t for something real. Not having too much misery is not something real.

Feeling joy well up from within you, that is Real. Seeing your day unfold in harmonious constructive, uplifting and transforming manner, that is Real.

Remember this, so that you don’t settle for some artificial substitute for joy, like gratitude that you didn’t have a bad day.

Within its barricades …

… meaning the bubble …

… is still a tiny segment of the Son of God, complete and holy, serene and unaware of what you think surrounds it.

That tiny segment of the Son of God is you. Because there’s only one you, no matter how you have twisted the definition of you so that you have become unrecognizable to yourself in your holiness. There’s still only one you. And that which is on the inside of the barricade—on the inside of the bubble—is identical to and part of inseparably that which is on the outside of the bubble.

But …

Within the barricades …

… within the bubble, you are not experiencing yourself at peace. You’re experiencing yourself in fear, living a life of self-protection. That’s the illusion. You have fooled yourself into believing that you are not the Son of God that you Are. That you are not what God is expressing of Himself right now, right where you are. And you believe that you are this vulnerable mortal in a world of matter that inevitably sins, gets sick and dies.

Listen to this again:

Within its barricades …

… within the confines of the bubble …

… is still a tiny segment of the Son of God…

… you …

… complete and holy, serene and unaware …

… meaning, not altered in any way at this very moment from what God is expressing of Himself right there where you are. This is important! You are not a soul developing, growing, becoming refined. Now are you the Sons and Daughters of God, right in your experience of limitation, you are the Holy Son of God in your fullness, in your wholeness, as it says here, in your sereneness.

You will not grow into it. You are going to have to accept your wholeness as a present fact to be embraced, not denied, not argued against. That’s the important news!

Be you not separate…

… be you not separate, don’t be separate anymore. Don’t carry on this farce any longer.

Be you not separate. For the One Who DOES surround it…

… which is what? The Holy Spirit, your divinity held in trust while you’re insisting on being this miserable little piece of the Son of God inside this artificial boundary.

Be you not separate. For the One Who DOES surround it…

… the infinity of You—the rest of You—your sanity …

… has brought union to you, returning your little offering of darkness to the eternal Light.

How is this done? [Well] it is extremely simple, being based on what this little kingdom really is …

… the one you made up: The Kingdom of Heaven, under the rules and definitions that you have applied to It.

It is extremely simple, being based on what this little kingdom really is. The barren sands, the darkness and the lifelessness …

… that which causes you to be miserable and depressed and not in the fullness of your joy every day …

… are seen only through the body’s eyes.

They’re seen only through the eyes of the body as you have defined the body and what it’s function is and what the function of your eyes are.

Remember, we spoke some time ago about the fact that you send out messengers constantly into the world. They go out looking for confirmation of the message you asked them to look for. And so you feel hate or you feel fear, or you feel jealousy. And you send a messenger out into the world and indeed it will find what it was sent to find: jealousy, fear and so on. And it will come back and confirm to you that what you sent it out to find, is there. And you sent it out to find the very tools you are using with which to see your world—the very definitions you are using to define your world.

If it’s looking for your definitions rather than the Meanings God is bringing into play through the act of Creation at every moment, then obviously the messages coming back are going to confirm your mortality. They will confirm that you are justified in your anger, in your distress, in your fear. And you will believe them and you will govern yourself accordingly and you will cause your body to have those feelings of fear, anxiety … whatever.

But none of it will be real. Now:

The barren sands, the darkness and the lifelessness are seen only through the body’s eyes.

In other words, the body you have imagined has certain functions. The bottom line function is self-defense, self-preservation, because your mindset is that you are vulnerable, that you are unsafe, that you can be damaged and sooner or later, likely will be—inevitably will be.

Its vision …

… the vision of the body you have imagined …

… IS distorted, and the messages it transmits to you who made it to LIMIT your awareness ARE little and limited, and so fragmented they are meaningless.

But man, watch what happens: the messages come back and they don’t seem to be meaningless. They seem to be charged with importance and threat and justification for anger and acts of self-protection and doubt and suspicion and on and on.

From the world of bodies…

… the ones all of the Sons and Daughters of God have made up as the definition of themselves.

From the world of bodies, made by insanity, insane messages seem to be returned to the mind which made it. And these messages bear witness to this world…

… the world you made up—the world constituted of definitions that are obscuring what’s really there: the Kingdom of Heaven, what’s really present here: the Kingdom of Heaven.

And these messages bear witness to this world, pronouncing it as true. For YOU sent forth these messengers to bring this back to you.

Face it. The simplicity of it is, that if you are not looking at your world with the Father—joined—and giving your attention to the Father to learn of Him what you are looking at, then whatever you are seeing is a meaning you have given to it. And the confirmation of its validity has been accomplished by your sending out a messenger looking for confirmation. And so doubt will find that which is worthy of doubt, whether it’s true or not!

So it’s simple. If you are looking at a thing at any time during your day and you’re not consciously joined with the Father so that you are able to hear what the Father is telling you those things are, and you are experiencing meaning, then they are meanings you have provided. And what validates those meanings to you are the result of the return of messengers you have sent out looking for confirmation, and willing to return to you conclusions that are as insane as the thought that caused you to send it out to find the confirmation.

So there’s never any confusion actually available to you. If you’re not hearing the Father joined with you, revealing to you what is going on here, what the meaning of this is … if the Father is not with you every moment during your day, then the moments when He isn’t, is when you’re in charge. The moments He isn’t, is when you’re experiencing your definitions, rather than the truth.

So you can’t say, “Well, I don’t know for sure, I think I’m getting a hint that it’s this or that …” No. When the Father speaks, you know. You understand. You are inspired. It’s unmistakable. And if you’re not having constantly unmistakable experiences yet, the call is for you to persist further … to do what is normal for you to do. And the Course and I are providing a new definition of “normal.” Normal is not to be confused. Normal is not to be in a constant state of wondering but not knowing.

Now:

Everything these messages relay to you is quite external. There are no messages which speak of what lies underneath…

… when it says that the messages relay to you what is external, it means “out there” and it also means “on the surface.” And on the surface what is communicated is your meanings, your definitions—how you define the world.

There are no messages which speak of what lies underneath, for it is not the body that COULD speak of this.

That’s why the two-step is essential, so that you can get to what’s underneath. “Father, in spite of what I think, in spite of what I have determined everything to mean, what is the truth here? In other words, underneath the definition I have overlaid the Kingdom of Heaven with, what is the truth? Reveal the Kingdom of Heaven to me.”

Now the body could not speak to you about what’s underneath it. Because the body will only convey to you the words you put in its mouth. And you send out a messenger of suspicion and because there’s no intelligence being used in determining what is true, the message comes back that indeed there is something for you to be suspicious about.

But when you say, “Father, what is the truth here in spite of what I think, or in spite of what is suggested by circumstances,” your sending out a messenger there that says, “I want to know the truth—I want to know the truth of the Kingdom of Heaven that is covered over by my definitions.” When you practice the two-step, you want to know the truth that is behind the appearance.

Its eyes …

… the body’s eyes …

… perceive it not; its senses remain quite unaware of it; its tongue cannot relay its messages. Yet God can bring you there, if you are willing to follow the Holy Spirit through seeming terror, trusting Him not to abandon you and leave you there. For it is not His purpose to frighten you, but only YOURS.

As you’ve already learned, you frighten yourselves so as to be distracted from the guilt you’re feeling, which if you were willing to feel it, would uncover to you that you’re trying to do something unnatural to you and actually impossible to succeed at. And it would point your attention in the direction of the two-step and the holy instant and joining with the Father.

You are severely tempted to abandon Him at the outside ring of fear, but He would lead you safely through and far beyond.

Well, in practical terms what does that mean: “the outside ring of fear?” It means: That place where you have to abandon your self-protection because you are choosing to lean into the holy instant, you’re choosing to lean into what you haven’t figured out for yourself yet. You’re abandoning the practice of self-control and the control of everything else.

When you are willing to say, “Father, aside from my best judgments, what is the truth here?” you’re asking to know something that you’re not aware of at the moment and you are having to yield to something other than yourself and this is frightening.

This is what you run into when you get near the bubble and engage in anything that might cause it to pop. And you need not to be surprised by the experience. Understand that when you run into this, you are severely tempted to abandon Him, the Holy Spirit or the Father…

… but He would lead you safely through and far beyond …

… an important point. You’re going to have to move through the fear, not around it and not finding some way to avoid it completely. You have to move through the gargoyles that you have put in place to keep yourself from finding out that not only are you guilty as you believe you are but there is a punishment awaiting you—which is not true.

The circle of fear lies just below the level the body sees…

… the body you have defined, the purposes you have defined it as having do not allow it to see the holiness of life, the holiness of your Brother, the holiness of your Self. But it’s there. It’s there in everything you see. The holiness of Creation is there in everything you see right now.

The universe is not going through the “refiner’s fire” and becoming more spiritual and moving toward an ultimate divinity. The universe is the Kingdom of Heaven. You call it a universe because you’ve decided not to see the Kingdom of Heaven because if you saw the Kingdom of Heaven you would be joining with the Father and you would no longer be saying, “Father, I would rather define everything myself. I would rather do it my way. I would rather be independent. I would rather do everything solo.”

Again:

The circle of fear lies just below the level the body sees, and seems to be the whole foundation on which the world is based.

What world? The world you’ve defined with your frightened mental attitude.

Here are all the illusions, all the twisted thoughts, all the insane attacks, the fury, vengeance and betrayal that were made to keep the guilt in place, so that the world …

… that you’re defining …

… could rise from it and keep it hidden.

Keep the guilt hidden. Keep you distracted from the guilt, engaged in becoming a successful independent agent without a Father, without a Source.

Its shadow …

… the shadow of guilt …

… rises to the surface, enough to hold its most external manifestations in darkness, and to bring despair and loneliness to it and keep it joyless.

Don’t be afraid of this. Don’t be afraid of looking at it because in looking at it you can see that there’s really nothing about it that you would want to hold on to. And if indeed you have been holding onto it, you can choose to let go of it now, since you didn’t know you were doing that.

Yet its intensity …

… the intensity of guilt …

… is veiled by its heavy coverings, and kept apart from what was made to keep it hidden.

What distracts you successfully is the ego determination to make something of itself—to become a success, to become wealthy, to become wise, to become special, to become what would be equal to the Son of God without being the Son of God.

The body cannot see this, for the body arose from this for its protection…

… the body you created arose from the need to cover up fear, to cover up guilt, for the protection of guilt, …

… which must always depend on keeping it NOT seen. The body’s eyes …

… the eyes whose function and meaning you have defined as material.

The body’s eyes will never look on it. Yet they will see what it dictates.

The body will remain guilt’s messenger, and will act as it directs as long as you believe that guilt is real.

Why? Because as long as you believe guilt is real, you’re going to send out the messengers which will come back and confirm the need to protect yourself so that you can avoid feeling the guilt.

For the reality of guilt is the illusion which seems to make it heavy and opaque, impenetrable, and a real foundation for the ego’s thought system. Its thinness and transparency are not apparent until …

… what?

… you see the light BEHIND it.

The bubble is just a bubble. It’s just a thin film standing between you and Reality and causing Reality to appear distorted. And you don’t need to be subject to it any longer and there is nothing actual to hold you back from experiencing it.

Listen:

This heavy-seeming barrier, this artificial floor which looks like rock…

… meaning, solid …

… is like a bank of low dark clouds that seems to be a solid wall before the sun. Its impenetrable appearance is wholly an illusion. It gives way softly to the mountain tops which rise above it, and has no power at all to hold back anyone willing to climb above it …

… the cloud bank …

… and see the sun. It is not strong enough to stop a button’s fall, nor hold a feather. Try but to touch it and it disappears; attempt to grasp it and your hands hold nothing.

But you see, if you are frightened to touch it because it is keeping guilt out of sight which keeps you free of the compulsive fear that you’re going to be terribly punished for something, you will not try to touch it, you will not try to move through it. And this is why you need help. And this is why you need to return the little part of you inside the bubble back to the Holy Spirit—a transferring of identity outside the bubble—so that the wholeness and integrity and therefore sanity of you congeals, jells as actual, and insanity no longer presents itself as a definition of your state of mind.

Yet in this cloud bank it is easy to see a whole world rising. A solid mountain range, a lake, a city, all rise in your imagination, and from the clouds the messengers of your perception return to you, assuring you that it is all there.

You know, you remember lying on your back on the grass and looking at the clouds and seeing a dog and a horse and a bird … and all sorts of things.

Figures stand out and move about, actions seem real, and forms appear and shift from loveliness to the grotesque. And back and forth they go, as long as you would play the game of children’s make believe. Yet however long you play it, …

… and I will say, however long you played it as a child.

Yet however long you play it, and regardless of how much imagination you bring to it, you do not …

… and did not …

… confuse it with the world below, …

… you know, the lawn you were lying on, the trees that you could see through as you looked into the sky and the clouds …

… you [did] not confuse it with the world below, nor seek to make it real.

Not so with your determination to be an independent agent, because what you see—the images you’ve created—become essential to your attempt at successfully becoming real in your own right. And so you take the images seriously. And that is insane—something you didn’t do as a child when you looked.

So should it be with the dark clouds of guilt, no more impenetrable and no more substantial. You will not bruise yourself against them in traveling through. Let your Guide TEACH you their unsubstantial nature …

… you’ve got to do it! You’ve got to be willing to join with your Guide and move through the fear of guilt and retribution so that you might arrive at a point where you can see through the barrier, see the light on the other side and realize that the barrier is flimsy and insubstantial and not justifying your becoming immobilized and moving no further forward.

Let your Guide TEACH you their unsubstantial nature as He leads you past them, for beneath them is a world of light …

… underneath the dust of the definitions that you have spread all over Creation so that it now looks bleak and mortal, right there, currently holy and divine, is the Kingdom of Heaven available to you to experience.

Let your Guide TEACH you their unsubstantial nature as He leads you past them…

… and I would say, not only let your Guide teach you, demand of your Guide to teach you. He will be glad to answer as many questions as you have. He will be glad to assuage your fears no matter how completely they engulf you, because your Guide, the Holy Spirit is the wholeness of you, which loves you and embraces you and wants you not to suffer from illusions. It wants you to experience Its sanity, because Its sanity is yours already.

Let your Guide TEACH you their unsubstantial nature as He leads you past them, for beneath them is a world of light whereon they cast no shadows. Their shadows lie upon the world beyond them, still further from the light. Yet from them TO the light their shadows cannot fall.

The world that lies beyond them, that the shadows can be cast upon, is the world of your definitions and meanings. But the shadows cannot be cast towards the light. And when you are engaging in the two-step, when you are letting your Guide teach you, when you are demanding that your Guide teaches you, nothing can block the communication that brings you back into the Oneness of your Being. It’s a fact. And learning that this is a fact is essential to your daring to take the steps to find out for a fact that it’s the truth, and come back into your right Mind.

This world of light…

… which isn’t the one you made up.

This world of light, this circle of brightness, is the real world where guilt meets with …

… what? Penalty? No…

… where guilt meets with forgiveness.

You must understand this. If you will dare to understand this and embrace it, it will give you the courage to move through the level of fear, the outer circle of fear where your illusions get undone together with their penalties.

Here, the world outside is seen anew, without the shadow of guilt upon it. Here are you forgiven, for here you have forgiven everyone. Here is the new perception, where everything is bright and shining with innocence…

… including you …

… washed in the waters of forgiveness, …

… including you …

… and cleansed of every evil thought you had laid upon it.

… by means of your mean-spirited definitions, which were mean-spirited because you were suffering from fear and guilt and thought it was necessary to protect yourself.

Here there is no attack upon the Son of God…

… You. You want the you I’m talking to right now, who still thinks it is enclosed, separate from your invulnerability and eternality in a tiny bubble.

Here there is no attack upon the Son of God…

… You …

… and you are welcome.

Remember the wonderful meaning of welcome? Welcome is when you are embracing someone without any shred of defense. And the state of welcome invites the presence of welcome from the one you are welcoming and a new way of being together emerges because defense isn’t destroying the experience of holiness.

Here is your innocence, waiting to clothe you and protect you, and make you ready for the final step in the journey inward. Here are the dark and heavy garments of guilt laid by, and gently replaced by purity and love …

… clothing you, representing the nature of that which it clothes, revealing to you a new self-awareness and thereby a new self-appreciation—an appreciation without reservation.

Yet even forgiveness is not the end. Forgiveness DOES make lovely, but it does not create. It is the source of healing, but it is the messenger of love, and not its Source. Here you are led that God Himself can take the final step unhindered, for here does nothing interfere with love…

… you’re not bringing a defense, you’re not bringing a boundary called a body that is there to keep you safe.

Here you are led that God Himself can take the final step unhindered, for here does nothing interfere with love, letting it be itself. A step beyond this holy place, a step still further inward but the one YOU cannot take, transports you to something completely different. Here is the Source of light; nothing perceived, forgiven nor transformed. But merely KNOWN.

The lyrics of a song said: “First you see the mountain, then you don’t, then you see the mountain …”2

When you arrive at the experience of the Source of light where nothing is perceived, forgiven nor transformed, but merely Known, you will discover that first you saw the Kingdom of Heaven but called it a material world and universe. And then in the transition, you didn’t see it. And then you see it as the Kingdom of Heaven. It will not disappear.

Creation will not disappear, but it will no longer return messengers to you confirming your isolation and seeming potential for grand success, because you won’t be sending messengers out looking for that. You will have let yourself be sucked out into the wholeness of You, outside the bubble as the bubble popped. And everything will be, I’m going to say, surprising, unexpected, and yet as It is revealed to you, you will recognize It because It is your Home. It always was your Home and you experienced It as It truly is, before.

Now you’re getting unstuck from misperceptions. Treat it seriously. In other words, treat it as though it were Real and not just fantasy or too good to be true. And dig into it on purpose. Let the Holy Spirit teach you and push the Holy Spirit, demand of the Holy Spirit to Know more.

This is the nitty-gritty and yet the nitty-gritty is simple.

I love you all. And I look forward to being with you next time.

  1. T18.9 The Delusional Thought System ↩︎

  2. Song: There is a Mountain, Artist: Donovan ↩︎

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