Nov 14, 2009
T15.9 The Time of Christ

Good evening. And welcome to everyone who’s joining us on the internet.

I’m going to re-read the last sentence from last week—the last couple sentences:

If you would accept but this ONE idea, your fear of love would vanish. Guilt CANNOT last when the idea of sacrifice has been removed. For if there is sacrifice, as you are convinced, someone must pay and someone must get. And the only question which remains to be decided is HOW MUCH is the price for getting WHAT.

Now the next sentence should elicit a smile at the least if not some laughter:

As host to the ego, you believe that you can give ALL your guilt away WHATEVER you think, and purchase peace.

Now, either that’s very clear to you or you have an example of how you block—period.

As host to the ego, you believe that you can give ALL your guilt away WHATEVER you think, and purchase peace.

Well you say, “What does that mean … I believe that I can give ALL my guilt away? I can’t think of a way to give my guilt away.” You see, that should make you smile. It’s really easy—and you do it all the time. It’s called, laying a guilt trip on your brother! That’s how you give your guilt away. You make someone else responsible for your dilemma or your problem or the results of your bad decisions or the result of your one faulty decision.

So, let’s look at it again with a little bit more of a fine tune:

As host to the ego, you believe that you can give ALL your guilt away WHATEVER you think…

… now those three words…

… WHATEVER you think…

… are key words because thinking is what produces guilt. Thinking is the bad behavior, if you will. It’s what you do instead of listening and having the experience of Knowing, which is your natural way of being conscious.

It’s your thinking that gets you into trouble. Because you think you think for a purpose. And that purpose is to come to conclusions different from the Father’s—understandings, definitions—different from the Truth.

So you think …

… you can give ALL your guilt away WHATEVER you think…

… in other words, without stopping thinking…

… and purchase peace. And the payment does not seem to be YOURS.

You know, your brother’s the one with the guilt trip laid on him—he’s the one that’s got to defend himself. And if you’re really good at what you’re doing, he won’t throw it back at you. You will have snookered him and he’s caught. And he’ll become very defensive and try to straighten things out and get you to see the truth, you see?

And the payment does not seem to be YOURS. While it is obvious that the ego DOES demand payment, it never seems to be demanding it of YOU.

Why? Because you have this subterfuge you can bring into play, called, laying a guilt trip on your brother. Then you can discuss it, argue it, work your way through it with your brother, finesse him into agreement—maybe giving him a little bit back so he’s not quite as guilty and doesn’t have to feel quite as bad—and appreciates your generosity. You see?

But, you’re still paying and you’re still the only one paying, no matter how interesting the interchange became, no matter how much friendlier you both seem to be with each other as a result of your beneficent giving—a little here and there, while taking a lot here and there. You see?

All the while that it seems like something is going on that’s meaningful, it’s costing you something. And so I’m going to ask you right now, “What is it it’s costing you?” I’m not going to answer the question. You do know the answer already. But I’m throwing the question out for right now: “What is it costing you when it seems not to be costing you anything?”

While it is obvious that the ego DOES demand payment…

… nobody will deny that …

… it never seems to be demanding it of YOU. For you are unwilling to recognize that the ego, which you invited, is treacherous only to those who think they are its host.

Well, you’re the one who thinks you are its host, not the one you’ve blamed for what you’re guilty of.

So, the ego isn’t really being treacherous to your brother or your sister, it’s being treacherous to you. But you can’t see the treachery because you don’t know what you’ve lost. You’ve forgotten what you paid in order to have the experience of an ego and the experience of guilt and fear. You’ve forgotten what you paid. What is it? What was it?

The ego will never let you perceive this, since this recognition would make it homeless.

You would no longer invite it. You would no longer be its host. You just wouldn’t.

For when this recognition dawns clearly, you will not be deceived by ANY form the ego takes to protect itself from your sight.

You see, there’s only one problem. And when that one problem becomes perfectly clear to you … when that one mistake becomes perfectly clear to you, then the impact of the mistake becomes clear to you and the whole ball of wax becomes unreasonable and unwanted. And you put it down.

Each form will be recognized as but a cover …

… or what you might call, “a cover-up.”

Each form will be recognized as but a cover for the one idea that hides behind them all;

… that idea being …

… that love demands sacrifice, and is therefore inseparable from attack and fear.

That’s the one idea that hides the blatant truth about what the ego is and what the ego does, and what the effect is, and who the effect is on.

Again …

Each form will be recognized …

… each form the ego takes …

Each form will be recognized as but a cover for the one idea that hides behind them all; that love demands sacrifice, and is therefore inseparable from attack and fear. And that guilt is the PRICE of love, which must be paid BY fear.

Love costs you something. We discussed that at length last time. Love constitutes sacrifice as you perceive it, and as you practice it, and as you think it is. If you love something, if you love someone, you must give up for them.

And at the bottom line, not giving up constitutes a self-disrespect, at least in the ego’s terms. And that self-disrespect is something you’re guilty of. It constitutes a lack of integrity, even though you are attempting to pretend to have integrity by giving up things as an expression of love. Convoluted, isn’t it?

How fearful, then, has God become to you, and how great a sacrifice do you believe His Love demands! For total love would demand total sacrifice.

Not true. But the mindset you currently entertain about love and about sacrifice causes you to come to that conclusion and no other—that causes God to be very fearful and something you don’t really want to approach.

And so the ego seems to demand less of you than God, and of the two is judged as the lesser of two evils, one to be feared a little, but the other to be destroyed. For you see love as DESTRUCTIVE, and your only question is who is to be destroyed, you or another?

You see, those are the blacks and whites of it … or the black and white of it. You don’t necessarily come to the point of destroying another or being destroyed.

But relationships tend to be a way of keeping perceived balance where imbalance prevails, so that relationships are a constant defense, a defense that doesn’t appear to be defensive because it’s expressed in the language of love … of caring … of being considerate. Why? Because love is felt and it’s a gift that simply pours forth or because it’s practice soothes the savage breast and brings peace, or a certain amount of peace where peace would not prevail.

And so love is always a defense being used in a hostile environment. That’s a sacrifice. And as I said last time, there’s a certain mean-spiritedness to it. It’s not love, it is attack.

It is important to see this. Because you thought you were going for something good. But the recipe being used doesn’t allow for the good you’re wanting to bear fruit truly, because it is an act of defense. It is you, not letting yourself into that peace of your Being in which you can dare to be vulnerable, because in your peace you know you are utterly safe. And then from that peace and safety, you can embrace your Brother, your Sister, your world, without the defense that alters love and causes it to be an expression of mean-spiritedness.

Without mean-spiritedness being added to it, the love you are expressing is pure and is an aspect of the Movement of the Love that God is embodied in you, as you, and finding expression “in the world.”

… you see love as DESTRUCTIVE, and your only question is who is to be destroyed, you or another? You seek to answer this question in your special relationships, in which you are both destroyer and destroyed in part, but with the idea of being able to be neither completely.

In other words, you can be a destroyer in part, you can be destroyed in part, but you can’t ever be destroyed completely. And you can’t ever be a destroyer completely.

Talk about wishy-washy, talk about no commitment … and yet it’s engaged in as an act of defense, it’s engaged in and is an act of mean-spiritedness.

And this you think saves you from God, Whose total Love would completely destroy you.

Mind you, this isn’t true. God’s love constitutes the unalterable permanency of your divine Being. That’s the truth—the unalterable and unaltered truth.

But as long as you are insisting upon pretending to be an independent autonomous agent, you will have fear and guilt accompanying you. And love will be a defense—not love. And you will be paying the cost of what? Of being unconscious of who you Are because you are unconscious of your Source—unconscious of God, unconscious of your Father. You see?

All the time you seem to be having meaningful ongoing relationships, that are really negotiations for the best amount of peace that can be had without everybody having to sacrifice everything, as long as that is going on and it seems to be a worthwhile activity to engage in, you are absolutely unconscious of what your real function is, which is not to negotiate with your “bad” Brothers, and work out problems, but is to be in communion with your Father; a communion in which you are experiencing your true divinity and therefore, the true divinity with your Brothers so that you are relating to your Brothers, not in negotiations at all, but in activities of fulfillment and joy, because there’s no apparent need for anything else.

The key element that stands in the way of your participating in the holy instant—of your employing the holy instant—is this ridiculous idea. It’s a malicious idea actually, that you have a choice between being host to the ego or hostage to God.

You would only be a host to that which would in some way, be your ally. And you would only be a hostage to that which would be your enemy. As long as you think that this is what you’re faced with, you’re not going to choose to be the host of your enemy … no way.

And so you will not embrace the holy instant. And you will not let yourself in to that place where only God’s laws prevail.

This has to become crystal clear to you so that you can see exactly how black and white it is. So that you can see that there’s either fulfillment or no fulfillment as an actuality.

Let me ask you this: “What would you imagine you will be engaged in … what would be the activities you would be involved in if you knew you were invulnerable, if you knew that the environment of every aspect of your Being and experience was Love? Do you think you would be engaged in the activities you’re presently engaged in?” Well, perhaps some of them. But a lot of them you will not be engaging in.

And so you will be abandoning many things. But here’s the big question: “Will you abandon the chase after the carrot that’s being dangled in front of you, with the promise of your fulfillment, with the promise of your becoming a real boy … a real girl?”

Now, there’s an activity that you’ll have to abandon. And indeed, if you were Awake, you wouldn’t even be enticed into that activity—you certainly wouldn’t be engaged in it.

The one activity that you’re engaged in that keeps you from being Awake is your attempt to be an independent agent for change. And I mean by that, not in any divine and any healthy sense, but an independent agent for change—meaning something that can exist separate from its Source with a capacity to cause things to happen. That’s the one and only thing … that’s the one and only thing you have to abandon—that’s the simplicity of it.

Continuing …

You think that everyone OUTSIDE yourself demands your sacrifice…

Why would you think that? Because that’s what you demand of everyone else. And so you’re suspicious of them, knowing yourself.

You think that everyone OUTSIDE yourself demands your sacrifice, but you do not see that ONLY you demand sacrifice, and ONLY of yourself.

Here’s more of the black and whiteness:

… you do not see that ONLY you demand sacrifice, and ONLY of yourself.

Now, you don’t think about sacrifice and you don’t say, “I intend to sacrifice and I intend to sacrifice myself.” You say, “Well, here’s another day. I have a lot of things to do, a lot of problems to solve. And I’m gonna get up, get dressed, go to work and do the best damn job I can.”

Sounds like a respectable thing to do … no? Of course. But that’s how you demand sacrifice of yourself. And that’s what has to become clear. You’re demanding sacrifice of yourself because there’s not one aspect of your decision regarding your upcoming day that has involved abandoning thinking, abandoning personal, private decision making, abandoning the attempt to be able to cause change, and becoming still enough that you can hear what we might call the “still small voice of God” or your divinity, providing the awareness of what fits in your upcoming day that will uncover the Kingdom of Heaven that is the actual nature of the day you’re entering into and participating in.

So, your very good intent, your very principled plan for your day to make contributive changes is the way you sacrifice the direct experience of your divinity, the direct experience of your holy Sonship, the direct experience of the truth about you. That’s the way you sacrifice it.

The sacrifice is covered up by a good intent to be carried out by an independent agent trying to be the best damn independent agent you can be, so that ultimately you can become a real boy and a real girl, on your own without a Father, without a Source. Do you see?

You think that everyone OUTSIDE yourself demands your sacrifice, but you do not see that ONLY you demand sacrifice, and ONLY of yourself.

You demand it of yourself by preoccupying yourself and giving your attention where your atonement, where your fulfillment, where your conscious ascension into your divine Selfhood cannot possibly occur. That’s how you do it.

Yet the demand of sacrifice is so savage and so fearful that you CANNOT accept it where it is.

Well, you know what? It may be savage and fearful, but you can dare to take a look at it. We’re doing it right now. And you can dare to look at it even more closely. And the reason for looking at it more closely is not so you can be condemned for it but so that you can see what a useless thing you’re engaged in. Why? So that you can spontaneously and effortlessly cast it aside—let it go, not employ it anymore.

But the REAL price of not accepting this has been so great that you have given God away rather than look at it.

You’d rather not think about God. You’d rather not care. You’d rather that it not be meaningful to you. You’d rather that it not be something that was supposed to be meaningful to you to know who your Father is. And that knowing who your Father is, is something that would have awesome and infinite impact on you that didn’t constitute or that doesn’t constitute a sacrifice at all, but fulfillment beyond your wildest imaginings.

Nevertheless …

… the REAL price of not accepting this has been so great that you have given God away rather than look at it. For if God would demand total sacrifice of you, you thought it safer to project Him outward and AWAY from you, and not be host to Him. To Him you ascribed the ego’s treachery, inviting it to take His place to PROTECT you from Him.

Now why? There’s a reason you would find that justifiable. And the reason is: That the whole ego frame of reference is such that it is telling you that through your own personal efforts and your own ongoingly developed skill, you can become successful in your own right and therefore, worthy of unlimited respect, appreciation and valuing. The promise has been great.

The promise has been that when this happens, you without God, without holiness, without anything outside of your own skill and effort, will be immutable—incapable of sin, disease, death, damage, injury and therefore, eternal, forever perfect, unchangeably perfect. Quite a promise. And it’s something that you will have secured for yourself at your own hand. You will have proven to yourself your worth and your validity. And who better to prove it to you than you, yourself … who more trustworthy to prove it to you than you, yourself and your experience.

Can you see how black and white it is? That’s the way you sacrifice and that’s the justification for the sacrifice. But what you’ve forgotten is that what you’re sacrificing is your sanity and your divine joy and your Birthright as the Son of God.

To Him …

… God …

… you ascribed the ego’s treachery, inviting it to take His place to PROTECT you from Him. And you do not recognize that it is what YOU invited in that would destroy you, and DOES demand total sacrifice of you.

Let this sink in. Let this be so perfectly clear.

No partial sacrifice will appease this savage guest, for it is an invader who but SEEMS to offer kindness…

[chuckling] It is so kind that it will dangle that carrot of success in front of your nose forever, without your ever achieving it.

No partial sacrifice will appease this savage guest, for it is an invader who but SEEMS to offer kindness, but always to make the sacrifice complete.

In other words, it does it so as to always keep you so preoccupied with getting the carrot and becoming something on your own that the furthest thing from your mind is to ask how did you come to exist so that a carrot could be dangled in front of your nose? Where were you before the carrot got dangled? You’re so preoccupied with the chase and the potential accomplishment that there’s not enough peace and presence of mind [chuckling] to cause you to stop and say, “Wait a minute, how did all of this get started?” But now someone’s telling you that not only can you do this, you must do it—it’s time to do it.

It’s time for someone to tell you, you’ve been sacrificing the totality of the Good life (the capital “G” Good life)—the God life. You’ve been sacrificing it. It’s not required. You can stop. And it’s not something that’s being afflicted upon you. It’s something you’re creating by virtue of an unintelligent activity. You know, you’ve heard of “skirt chasers,” you’ve heard of “women chasers,” but you better become aware that you’re a “carrot chaser.” And let it sound silly. Let it be silly, so that it’s that much easier for you to say, “Father, help!” …so that it’s enough for you to abandon the independence and try something different.

You will not succeed in being partial hostage to the ego…

… again, here’s the black and whiteness.

You will not succeed in being partial hostage to the ego, for it keeps no bargains, and would leave you nothing.

It leaves you nothing, because in your preoccupation for the quest for the carrot you’re not thinking about God, you’re not looking toward your Source, your attention is not where your sanity can register with you. So it leaves you with nothing, nothing that’s Real about you anyway.

You will have to choose between …

… again, black and white.

You will have to choose between TOTAL freedom and TOTAL bondage, for there are no alternatives but these.

Either you’re chasing the carrot or you’re not chasing the carrot. There’s no in-between.

You have tried many compromises in the attempt to avoid recognizing the one decision which must be made. And yet it is the recognition of the decision, JUST AS IT IS…

… the simple decision to stop chasing the carrot, to stop trying to be something on your own, to rejoin with your Father—to get rid of the divorce.

… it is the recognition of the decision, JUST AS IT IS…

… in its simplicity …

… that makes the decision so easy!

Listen …

Salvation is simple being of God, and therefore very easy to understand. Do not try to project it from you and see it OUTSIDE yourself. In you are both the question and the answer; the demand for sacrifice and the peace of God.

So, we have come logically step-by-step to a clarity. So, what’s next?

What’s next is The End of Sacrifice, which is the sub-heading of the next section. The End of Sacrifice will come as a result of making the one single decision that undoes all of illusion. And that’s what this is all about.

Yes, if you insist on pretending that you have a choice between being host to the ego or hostage to God, then you will have to address each struggle, each suffering experience that identifies the fact that you’re going against the grain of your Being to find out the truth of it. And undoing each one could take you a long time. And it’s unnecessary because you can make the one decision now. You can take the black and whiteness of the truth that we’ve been discussing and on the basis of it, change your mind.

I’m not interested in … I’m not fascinated by messy struggles, ongoing conflict. Don’t you be either. It’s not necessary!

This week I want you to consider the actual uselessness of being or attempting to be an orphan, an independent agent for change. There is so much more clarity now available to you that it is much easier for you to do the one essential thing.

“Oh, I don’t want to be the first one. I don’t want to stand out like a sore thumb. I’m going to wait until next week and see if anybody else has done it and how it’s going for them.” What, while you continue to chase the carrot? Okay … okay …

I love you. I love you all and I wish for you instantaneous Awakening. And if you don’t opt for that, I will stand with you until you do.

I will stand with you constantly pointing out to you what you should be doing instead, because that is love.

I look forward to being with you all next time.

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